Have you been wronged? I think it’s safe to say that, in one way or another, we all have. And I’m not talking about being cut off in traffic. I’m talking about the kind of pain that goes deep, that feels impossible to forget.

Are you holding onto an offense like this one? Some of us have become so used to carrying this debt that we’re unaware of how much it weighs us down. Maybe your spouse has lost your trust. Or maybe your child has distanced herself from your family. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to send this pain away?

The word ‘forgive’ in Greek is aphiemi, which literally means to send away. So forgiveness is a refusal to continue carrying this offense and instead a decision to send it away.

I’ve heard it said, “forgiveness is setting someone free and finding out that it’s you.” Withholding forgiveness is one of the largest obstacles we can place in between ourselves and fullness of joy. It might be time to send it away.  

In my life, when I’m struggling to forgive, it affects everything. I’m not present in the moment because I keep returning to the moment when I was hurt. I’m not as kind because I feel weighed down by the debt I carry. I’m not thoughtful because I’m obsessed with how I’ve been wronged. And I don’t want the best for others because I believe I am “owed” something.  

But when I forgive and send it away…I’m free.  

I’ve learned that even when it’s hard to forgive, I’m actually choosing between living burdened and living free. I’m choosing between standing still and moving forward. And ultimately, I’m choosing to reflect the grace I’ve received and pass it on to those who have wronged me.  

I find this freedom in God’s forgiveness and in his Word. Join me in reflecting on these four verses:

1. Ephesians 4:32 (GNTD)
   Instead, be kind and tender-hearted to one another, and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ.
2. Colossians 3:13 (GNTD)
   Be tolerant with one another and forgive one another whenever any of you has a complaint against someone else. You must forgive one another just as the Lord has forgiven you.
3. Romans 12:21 (GNTD)
   Do not let evil defeat you; instead, conquer evil with good.
4. Matthew 5:44 (GNTD)
   But now I tell you: love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may become the children of your Father in heaven.